I recently attended a Women’s Leadership Summit, where one of the discussion topics was gender equality. The conversation began with gender perspectives, pay gaps, and equal opportunities — and then moved into the debate of “carer vs career.”
When a woman has a child, should she have an equal right to follow her career while her husband takes parental leave to care for the child? The discussion revolved around women’s careers, ambitions, and in some ways, the idea of a woman’s value being linked to her career progression.
That got me thinking.
Suddenly, two beautiful ladies who had shaped my life came to mind — my maternal grandmother and my paternal grandmother.
My Maternal Grandmother
Born in Kenya, raised partly there and partly in India, my grandmother was married at sixteen and settled back in Kenya. She had seven amazing children.
She went to school till about Year 8, and with that education she taught her children while they were young, helping them with their homework and studies. She never had a formal job, never worked in an office; yet she was constantly building, nurturing, managing, and running a household that at times included extended family too.
Her quiet strength, compassion, and capability made her the heart of her home.
My Paternal Grandmother
Born in Bangladesh, she was married at just eleven years old to my grandfather in India. She never attended school, yet she built a life that was rich in love, order, and abundance.
She had her first child at thirteen and her tenth (and last) at thirty. During her peak years, she lived in a near-palatial mansion with vast gardens, rice paddy fields, cows, a swimming pool, and a mango orchard.
She oversaw everything, from the daily harvest of fresh vegetables and milk to ensuring her family was fed wholesome, delicious meals. The household functioned like clockwork:
children learning arts, attending school, the family eating and praying together. It was a disciplined, perhaps a little too disciplined, yet deeply loving home.
My father was extremely attached to his mother. He rarely spoke to my grandfather, not because of any distance in affection, but because his father was strict and always busy with work. My father confided everything to his mother. Once, my grandfather overheard my father telling his mother in detail about his first job in a mechanical engineering firm. That was the first time my grandfather asked my father to sit with him and share about his career.
It was his mother who bridged that gap — she was the emotional anchor of the family.
The Pillars of Our Homes
Both these ladies were the pillars, the glue, of their families. Their husbands were the financial providers, but these women were the foundation upon which the family thrived.
Even without formal education or careers, they were magnificent:
wise, strong, productive, compassionate, and endlessly capable – they had the power to weather any storm!
They did not have time to be needy because everyone needed them. They were always on their feet, creating homes filled with warmth, wisdom, and unconditional love.
In my eyes, they were never any less valuable than my grandfathers. If anything, they were more influential shaping generations with their values, guidance, and strength.
They were our home, our food, our warmth, our love, our support, our wisdom. They were our Maa Durga — powerful, nurturing, and divine.
True Legacy
Even after my grandfathers passed away, nearly twenty or more years before them, all their children, grandchildren, and extended families continued to visit, care for, and cherish their mothers. I still go about my day thinking (knowing) my grandmothers are watching over me!
And this makes me wonder: how can any career compare to the rich, lasting bonds these women built that nurtured and shaped so many human lives?
Today, we are grateful for our education, independence, and thriving careers. But when I think of these two extraordinary women, I know one thing for sure:
These beautiful ladies absolutely ROCKED — even without a career!
